I’d venture to say that most people reading this blog have, at a minimum, seen an optical illusion image. Maybe you didn’t identify it as such at the time, but you know that image which changes shape, color or some other characteristic right before your eyes, with just a tilt of your head? Yes that image. Well that image is me. Tilt your head just slightly, and you don’t even have to squint your eyes and you can see, I’m not what I look like.
I’m not okay! And I’m okay with not being okay. But apparently, I’ve given the illusion of being okay for so long, that people don’t tilt their heads anymore; and I’m not blaming anyone, I’m simply stating my perspective.
So you may be asking, “why is she not okay?” Well, I’m a mom to a black son, #boymom, I have three brothers, and my father is still living. For the sake of my sanity I will not venture to count or name the names of the black and brown lives lost, senselessly. But to deny my worry, my heightened sense of fear when my teenage son is out of sight, when the frequency of disheartening news stories flood my senses, is to deny who I am as his mother.
Luke 11:11 says “If a son asks for bread from any father among you, will he give him a stone? Or if he asks for a fish, will he give him a serpent instead of a fish?” When I read this scripture and think about all that is going on in our society, I think to myself, what parent sends their child out into the world with the expectation of never seeing them again, alive? To me, to have that thought process is the equivalent of giving your child a serpent when he asked for a fish.
But somehow resilience has taken on the illusion of comfort or at least comfortable acceptance. Trust me, it’s an illusion, I am not comfortable. While death if inevitable it is still uncomfortable. Murder and other senseless acts against nature’s melanated people on the other hand is beyond discomfort.
Discomfort can often be relieved by a change in position. For instance, a woman wearing what I call “carpet” shoes, may have some discomfort. You know the pair which are absolutely fabulous visually, but if she has to walk a mile on concrete, the shoes are coming off because they cause discomfort. By taking off the shoes (changing positions) she feels better.
Melanin can’t be removed like the shoes mentioned above, but if it could be removed, those graced by melanin would now be walking on streets filled with glass and barefoot. Walking barefoot on glass causes wounds and unattended wounds can become infected and untreated infection can cause ….well we don’t want to see an untreated infection.
While the human body has some self-repairing capabilities, infections caused by external sources generally require assistance. The human mind, a product of our brain activity, may take even longer to heal and does not always have wounds you can see.
Don’t be fooled by the illusion. It takes time, patience and an authentic heart for the illusion to begin to fade and reality to surface. Are you willing to do the work to discover the mystery behind the illusion? It’s okay if you’re not ready, but that doesn’t change the fact that the illusion exists.
Faith and Welllness
Pray! Then Wait.